Coffee Chats · On Finding a Career, Moving, and Where My Head Has Been At Lately

February 22, 2017

Hello, everybody.
I wanted to try something a bit different this week, and start a new type of post where I just sit down and chat, because I initially started this as a journaling site where I talk about the things I have been doing. Although this is primarily done through photos, I've been increasingly enjoying the posts where I just sit down and talk with whoever reads this, because it helps me sort my life out in this moment. The title comes from the primary power of tea helping me wind down.

Where have my posts been?
I've been sick. There's something happening with my sinuses, and I have been absolutely miserable these past couple of days. I called off of work today to give my self a five day weekend to just relax, focus on myself, write, and do some job applications. I also haven't really been feeling myself, I've been feeling a bit stuck lately, and I'm trying to get out of the funk, too.

My problem: I don't know what I want to do for a career, and I'm afraid of getting stuck.
I'm afraid of settling for some lame office job just because it's full time with benefits and it pays the bills. I'm afraid of moving into some shitty apartment in the suburbs just to get out of my house, and then stay stuck in the suburbs for the rest of my life. I'm 23, and I think this is the time that I should be making bigger moves, and working to accomplish things that I actually want to do, even if my dreams get a little out of hand.

I want to move somewhere new, somewhere that isn't Chicago. I've had California on the brain lately, and I'm not entirely sure where it came from. I watch a lot of YouTube, and I know a lot of them live out there, so maybe I'm swooning at the nice weather through them. I also watched Paper Towns today, and it takes place in Florida and the entire time I was basically aching for warmer weather, and somewhere that I can bask in the sun all of the time. Finally, I think it has to do with the sudden warm front that's been in Chicago lately, and I want to be able to experience it all of the time because it lightens my spirit, and my heart, and puts me in an overall better mood. I went outside today, and it was as though a weight had been lifted right off of my shoulders, like all of my seasonal depression (that laid on the foundation of my actual depression) evaporated, and I ache to feel that consistently. 

That being said, I currently have been hunting for jobs with Disney because they are based off of Glendale, and I think that would be my dream place to work, and I've been saying that for years, but now that I have my degree I can actually go for it, and that's an amazing feeling, but also terrifying. 

That's the move for this year. It's time for bigger and better things.

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